I drive an ancient Volvo station wagon. It’s not aerodynamic. It has a big flat back like a bus, which creates a long, powerful slip-stream. This means that if you pull up real close to my rear bumper the air rushing in to fill the vacuum behind my car will push you along, you barely have to open the throttle at all and you'll keep moving.
I know you’re saving the planet with your savvy fuel-conserving techniques, but in reality you’re just stealing my gas mileage. You’re not just magically being pulled forward, I’m basically towing your ass with air. Kinetic energy doesn’t just come from nowhere, that’s my energy. I can feel my car slow down when one of you pulls within six inches of my rear bumper.
And don’t think you’re going to come out on top when you rear-end my car because I had to gradually slow for a yield sign. This is a 1975 Volvo, it’s four thousand pounds of steel, half of which is in the bumper. It’s been rear-ended numerous times and it’ll still be puttering along long after your car has turned to a pile of iron oxide.
It’s not my imagination, I see people doing this to station wagons, trucks, and buses all over. It’s an epidemic. Cut it out.
—Sofar.